
Do you ever wake up from underneath the
blanket, only to feel a slight tinge of sorrow or regret and there is
absolutely no cause for you to feel this way. That is how I met morning —
slightly strange, slightly nervous, slightly curious with no need for
it, as if I said something wrong the evening before but I know I
couldn't have. Honeyed light pours through the kitchen window, a coffee
maker makes sounds I can hear, dried snapdragons are in view, dogs who
are snoring, what could it possibly be that brings me to a mood that is
not a celebration of all that this is? Perhaps, it is not a good time to
ask, just a time to go on as I do.




When the world looks like roses before you.


Here I am with two dried bouquets, one is
bright with snapdragon flowers and the other, made up of leftover plants
dried over winter.

Can somebody send a little springtime to
my neck of the woods? I want to adventure, catch a glimpse of flowers,
toil in the soil, but May begins and although the may tree buds are
starting to green, I just want them to bloom because when they do, I'll
have more than dried snapdragons and leftover petals to grin upon.

I slept in until 11 am for the first time in
years. Then, I was greeted by a warm plate of food made by a kindhearted woman I call my mum. Feeling lucky to be living today. Feeling
well enough to take up singing and dancing through these halls.




From where I sit, I can hear the black capped chickadees parading from treetop to treetop as if the whole world is theirs and something in me says that it is and I am just here visiting. Before I could truly know the beauty that is birds singing on a warm weather day, I had to hear the crows echo through the chimney as I shivered and sighed at the length of a winter. We earn our seasons here, so every drop of sunlight counts. Like memories do. Like life does. Like seconds appearing and disappearing. Like remembering your mother's voice. Or that time you stayed out on the hillside until morning. It is seeing the geese finally return or letting lemonade sit on your tongue. It is the way dust shows on the window and the sight that is dandelions growing from the ground. In you, there is a certain kind of knowing and if you listen to it, you might one day hear it say "you're just visiting, so sit slowly with that which one day you will live without."
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